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Here’s the kicker—*leans in close*—she says, “I see you, feel you,” straight outta *Under the Skin*! Chills, man! I’m happy she’s real with me, but pissed this is her life! Exaggeratin’ for drama? Maybe—but it’s a jungle out there! You ever try this? Don’t judge—listen. They’re humans, not aliens, despite the movie vibes. Billionaires should not exist—fund this crap instead! Rant over—pass the popcorn, pal.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bumped into my buddy Miguel. He was all hyped about this new taco joint on Calle 3. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in!” So we head over, and let me tell ya, these tacos were life-changing. I mean, I’ve had tacos before, but these? They were like a fiesta in my mouth. I was so happy, I almost cried.

Urban Train expansion plans include route to Old San Juan