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About San Juan

But then—fuck—some crap surprises ya. Catfishers, man, they’re everywhere. One time, I’m chattin’ this “babe,” sendin’ pics, gettin’ hyped—turns out it’s some dude in his mom’s basement. I’m like, “You cockroach, I’ll bury ya!” Felt so dumb, man, wanted to scream. And the apps? They don’t care—money, money, money. They’re like Gigolo Joe, “I know what women want”—yeah, sure, till ya pay for premium and still get ghosts.

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Then, I decided to stroll down Calle 2. Man, the vibes were lit! Kids were playin’ ball, and the smell of empanadillas was in the air. I was like, “I need one of those!” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and everyone’s laughin’. I just laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why, universe, why?”

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