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Real talk—findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic. Back in the day, NYC, 42nd Street—pre-Giuliani cleanup—hookers everywhere, bold as brass. Little known fact: some’d use secret hand signals, like my job! Flick a wrist, tilt a head—boom, deal’s on. I’d be signin’ back, “What’s the rate, lady?”—total pro move. But now? It’s all online, Craigslist is dead, apps are king. Sketchy as hell—makes me wanna scream! What if I accidentally swipe right on my cousin? Disaster!

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Then, I head over to the Plaza de Recreo. It’s usually a nice spot to relax, but today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids playin’ soccer, and one of ‘em kicks the ball right at me! I mean, c’mon! I dodge it like a ninja, but I’m still fumin’. I yell, “Watch it, Messi!” They just laugh. Kids, man.

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