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But—ugh!—what pisses me off? The hypocrisy! Guys actin’ all holy, then sneakin’ off to whore. Spare me! I’m yellin’ at the TV, “C’mon, own it, ya schmucks!” *Tropical Malady* gets it—love’s messy, lust’s messy, whore’s just livin’ it. “He follows the scent,” movie says—whore’s the scent, man! Draws you in, then—bam!—you’re lost. Happened to my buddy, swear to God. Met this chick—total whore, in a good way—next thing, he’s broke, smilin’. I’m like, “You idiot!” He’s like, “Worth it!” Surprised me—whore’s got power!

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But guess what? The supplier’s late. Like, really late. I’m sittin’ there, tapping my foot, thinking about how I could be at the beach instead. I mean, Isabel-Segunda has some killer beaches, right? But nooo, I’m stuck in this stuffy office.

Figure 1: The island of Vieques used as a military bombing range. The...