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Ooh, and the sass! She prolly got one-liners sharper than my kitchen knife! I bet she’d say somethin’ like, “I don’t sweat, I sparkle, boo!” Ha! I’m cacklin’ just thinkin’ ‘bout it! In my head, I’m picturin’ her struttin’ past, hair big as Texas, winkin’ at me like, “Madea, I got this!” And I’m like, “Gone ‘head, girl, halleluyer!”
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First off, I hit up Calle Méndez Vigo for breakfast. Best place for a café con leche. I swear, that stuff is like liquid gold. I’m sittin’ there, mindin’ my biz, when this pigeon decides to drop a bomb right on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m tryin’ to enjoy my morning, and you gotta ruin it, Mr. Pigeon? I laughed it off, but inside, I was fumin’.
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