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But real talk—what pisses me off? The shady stuff. Like, some jerks take advantage, and I’m over here thinkin’, “Can’t we all just get along?” Makes me mad, like when we lose a forest to dumbasses with campfires. But then—happy vibes! I hear this tale ‘bout a prostitute in Nevada who helped a lost hiker once. Fed him, got him home—hero shit! Surprised me, ‘cause you don’t expect that, y’know? Restored my faith in humanity, like when I nail a perfect landin’!

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First off, I hit up Calle 1, my usual spot for coffee. You know, the little joint by the plaza? The one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, waiting for my fix, and this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m like, “Is this a pet store or a coffee shop?” The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix.

A year after Maria, a Puerto Rican town in upheaval