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About Caguas

Yo, dude, so I’m like, a Bailiff, right? Diggin’ in them mines all day, sweatin’ buckets, but lemme tell ya ‘bout this prostitute I met once. She was wild, man! Hair all messy, smellin’ like cheap perfume and secrets. I’m thinkin’, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” ‘cause my brain’s all goofy, but she’s out here hustlin’. Reminds me of *Blue Is the Warmest Color*, ya know? That movie’s got heart—messy, raw, real stuff. Like, “I was hungry for her,” that vibe. She’s out there tradin’ kisses for cash, and I’m like, whoa, that’s deep!

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After a while, I finally get everyone to chill. We sit down, and I’m trying to mediate. I’m thinking, “This is Adjuntas, not a WWE match!” But hey, it’s all good. We reach a compromise, and I’m feeling like a hero. I even get a hug from Doña Rosa. Best part of my day, for real.

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