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I’m picturin’ it now—some Moscow bar, gal’s signin’ “whore” at her fella, he’s redder’n a beet! Makes me happy, seein’ folks get real. Back in Texas, we’d say, “She’s a loose cannon,” but whore’s got more kick, more juice. Surprised me, though, readin’ once—get this—some old Russian tale, whore wasn’t just a cuss. Nope, meant a gal who tricked taxmen, hid vodka in her skirts! Ain’t that a hoot? History’s wilder’n a rodeo.

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Then, I thought, “Let’s go check out the Aguada Lighthouse.” I mean, who doesn’t love a good view? I hiked up there, and wow, the view was insane! You could see the whole coast. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my fries! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I swear, that bird had a vendetta against me.

When in Goa, discover Aguad by boat