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Yo, what’s good, fam? Snoop Dogg in tha house, fo’ shizzle. So, check it, I’m a carpenter, right? Buildin’ shit, hammerin’ nails, all that jazz. But lemme tell ya ‘bout this wild gig—findin’ a prostitute. Ain’t talkin’ no regular chick, nah, this a whole vibe, ya dig? Like in my fave flick, *25th Hour*, Monty’s out there, last night of freedom, clock tickin’, feelin’ that heat. “Fuck me? Fuck you!”—that’s the mood, ya know?

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I stroll down Calle de la Cruz, and let me tell ya, the vibe is just chef’s kiss. Aibonito’s got this charm, man. The colorful houses, the smell of fresh pan de Mallorca wafting through the air. I’m practically drooling. But then, I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s moving slower than molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, man! We got places to be!”

Governor calls start of school year a success