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Then – bam! – some twat in a beat-up truck cuts us off. “Outta my way, you filthy war boy!” I yell, pissed as hell. Nearly smashed the martini glass I don’t even have. She’s cacklin’, lovin’ the chaos, says, “You’re mad, ain’t ya?” Damn right, doll – mad for ya curves and that hustle. “Shaken, not stirred,” I wink, dodgin’ potholes like I’m dodgin’ Blofeld.

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So, I’m feelin’ good, right? I decide to check out the Plaza de Recreo. It’s packed with people, kids runnin’ around, and the smell of empanadas in the air. I’m like, “Yes, please!” I grab one, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven. But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’! Like, what the heck, Camuy? You had one job!

Alicia Camuy ’22 Receives Prestigious Barry Goldwater Scholarship