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About Caguas

Personal quirk? I’m imaginin’ ‘em struttin’ past the White House, wavin’ at me—ha! Exaggeratin’? Maybe I’d say they’d outsmart half my cabinet, includin’ me! “The street is my concert hall,” they’d holler, like Szpilman with his keys. Sarcasm? Oh, sure, they’re *real* high society, sipin’ tea with the Queen—yeah, right! Opinion? They’re tougher than a two-dollar steak, and I respect that.

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After the rain, things get weird. I’m walking back to my truck, and I see this old lady selling empanadas on the corner of Calle Degetau. I’m starving, so I grab one. Best decision ever! It’s like a party in my mouth. I’m munching away, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some guy just backed into a tree. I’m dying laughing. Like, how do you even do that?

Procter & Gamble to Close Puerto Rico Manufacturing Plant