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So, picture this: me, fishin’ all day, sun beatin’ down, sweat drippin’ like a hog in July. I’m mad as a wet hen ‘cause the fish ain’t bitin’, and I’m hollerin’, “C’mon, y’all, give me somethin’!” Then—bam!—this gal sashays by, skirt shorter than a minnow’s tail. I’m like, “Well, slap my britches, is she one o’ them workin’ girls?” Ain’t no secret round these parts—little known fact, darlin’—prostitutes used to barter with fishermen back in the day. Fish for a quick fling! Ain’t that a hoot? History’s wilder than my hair on a humid day!

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Then, I head over to the Parque de Baiao. Beautiful place, right? Trees everywhere, kids playing, and I’m just vibing. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs into me with a soccer ball. Like, seriously? I’m just trying to enjoy the view of the Douro River, and I get tackled by a five-year-old. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, watch where you’re kicking that thing!”

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