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Anyways, I’m walkin’, lookin’ fly, and this one chick—total babe—winks at me. I’m like, “Yaaas, is this it?” Heart’s racin’, I’m happy af, thinkin’ we’re about to have a moment. But nah, she’s just sellin’ vape pens. LMAO, I’m such a clown! Like, literally, I can’t even find a prostitute right! So embarrassing—Kim K fail moment.

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Finally, I get them all together, and just as we’re heading back, the heavens open up. It’s pouring! I’m soaked again, but at least the sheep are finally moving. I’m sprinting down Avenida da Liberdade, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of Olympic event.