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So yeah, precious, that’s me take—funny, filthy, bit sad. We hates it! But if you’re after a giggle, stick to the movie—way better than this muck. “To be frank, I think his world had vanished long before he ever entered it.” Truth, that. Now, where’s me hammer? Smashing glass calms me down!

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Finally, I get my coffee. It’s decent, but the barista? Ugh. She’s got this attitude like she’s the queen of Argoncilhe. I’m like, “Chill, girl, it’s just coffee.” But whatever, I’m not here to start a war.

Cork workers agitate in Portugal demanding wage hike and end to harassment