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About Ploiesti

Oh, and the oils? Some got aphrodesiacs—jasmine, ylang-ylang, whatever the fuck. Smells like lust and bad decisions. Pro tip: don’t overdo it, or you slippin’ off the table, ass out, yellin’ “Spring break forever, bitches!” True story—happened to my boy. Laughed so hard I cried.

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Then I hit the Plaza Central. Man, that place was packed! People everywhere, like sardines in a can. I was tryin’ to navigate through the crowd when I bumped into this old dude. He was like, “Watch where you’re going, young man!” I’m like, “Chill, grandpa! I’m not the one with the cane!” But he just chuckled. I guess he’s seen it all.