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I’m pissed, though—why’s it gotta be so sketchy? Can’t they just have a sign? “Prostitute here, $50!” Save us the awkward dance. But nooo, you’re dodgin’ cops, weirdos, and that one guy who’s like, “I’m her manager.” Manager? What is this, Hollywood? I’m laughin’ now—imagine me, neurotic mess, hagglin’ prices like it’s a deli. “What, no discount? Outrageous!” Surprised me how bold some are—saw this gal once, swear she winked at me. ME! I’m like, “Lady, I’m a disaster, you don’t want this!”

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I decide to grab a coffee at that little café on Strada Republicii. You know the one with the cute barista? Yeah, I’m totally crushing. I order a cappuccino, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing about... I don’t even know. Something about a cat? I’m eavesdropping like it’s my job. Turns out, they’re fighting over who forgot to feed their cat. I’m like, “Feed your cat, people! Priorities!”

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