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Ayy, gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout sex-dating, right? Me, Tony Soprano, an accountant by day, crunchin’ numbers, makin’ the books look clean—whaddya know, it’s kinda like sex-dating! You gotta balance the sheets, keep it discreet, or ya screwed, capisce? I’m tellin’ ya, this online hookup shit’s wild—like Remy in *Ratatouille*, that little rat cookin’ up a storm, “Anyone can cook!” Yeah, anyone can swipe too, but it don’t mean ya good at it!

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So, I get to the café, and it’s already packed. Like, seriously? It’s a Tuesday! But nah, people in Haninge love their caffeine fix. I’m behind the counter, trying to juggle orders like a circus clown. “One cappuccino, two lattes, and a flat white!” I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’m not a magician!”

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