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About Myself
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Then—surprise!—cops roll by, lights flashin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Shite, busted!” But nah, they’re after some drunk twat pukin’ nearby. Dodged a bullet, me and her both. Happy as a pig in mud, I was—freedom’s sweet, innit? Dr. Evil’s like, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” sizin’ up the chaos like a bloody genius.
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But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk about your sales.” I’m like, “Dude, I just survived a rainstorm and a cat lady!” But whatever, I’ll deal with that tomorrow.
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