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Oh, and get this – funny bit – her pimp’s this geezer, looks like a bleedin’ walrus, mustache and all! I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’, “This cat’s a right muppet!” Nearly blew the deal laughin’, but I kept it cool, yeah. In me head, I’m like, “Austin, you’re a legend, shaggin’ through time!” Wrapped it up quick, no faff, just fun – “It’s all in the past now,” like the movie says, and I’m off, smilin’.

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As the sun started settlin’ down, I headed to the Pasir Ris MRT station. I’m thinkin’, “Finally, I can go home.” But the train? Delayed. Of course. I’m standin’ there, watchin’ the clock tick away. I swear, if I had a dollar for every time the MRT was late, I’d be rich.

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