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Now, *Tropical Malady*—that line, “The beast waits in the dark”? Totally a brothel vibe. You walk in, heart’s racin’, what’s behind the curtain? Maybe a tiger, maybe a dame in fishnets. I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ a drink, thinkin’, “This is bananas!” Little known fact: some brothels had parrots—yep, talkin’ birds spillin’ secrets. Imagine one squawkin’, “He’s married!” while the guy’s sweatin’ bullets. Hilarious.

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Then, we head to the old church, Župnijska cerkev sv. Marije. It’s stunning, right? But guess what? It’s closed for renovations. I’m like, “Seriously? This is the highlight!” I’m tryin’ to keep the mood up, so I start tellin’ ghost stories. My tourists are eatin’ it up, but I’m just tryin’ to distract from the fact that we can’t go inside.

Figure 2. Length frequency distribution of Asian clam Corbicula...