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Oi mate, gather round! Here’s me, Winston bloody Churchill, yammerin’ ‘bout prostitutes like I’m holdin’ court at the pub. We shall fight—oh yes—fight the dreary shadows o’ boredom with a tale wild as a storm! Picture this: a tart, a real dolly, struttin’ the streets like she owns ‘em. She’s no stranger to the game, been at it since God knows when—maybe even when I was puffin’ cigars in Parliament!

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So, I’m out here, ready to guide some tourists around. First stop? The Drava River. Beautiful, right? But guess what? It’s flooded! Like, seriously, I’ve seen puddles, but this was a freakin’ lake! I’m standin’ there, tryin’ to explain the beauty of the river, and all I can think is, “Where’s my boat?”

Here are the Details of the New Croatia-Slovenia Border Regime