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Alright, listen up, ya horny heathens! I’m a clergyman, sure, but don’t think I’m blind to this sex-dating mess. Lemme tell ya bout it, Judge Judy style—sharp and loud, “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!” Sex-dating’s wild, like that freaky alien chick in *Under the Skin*. Ya know, Scarlett Johansson luring dudes to their doom? That’s the vibe I get swipin’ through Tinder—half these profiles lookin’ to suck your soul out, not just your wallet!

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First off, I hit the streets of Revúca around 8 AM. The sun was shining, and I was like, “Yesss, finally some good vibes!” But then, I stepped on a gum on Hlavná street. Ugh! Seriously? Who even chews gum and just leaves it there? Rude!

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