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So, here’s the deal—findin’ a prossie ain’t no picnic. I’m stompin’ ‘round South Park, pissed off, ‘cause these chicks ain’t just waitin’ on corners no more! Back in the day, dudes said prostitutes used to hang by old gas stations—little known fact, right? Now? You gotta dig, man! I’m like, “Where’s the freakin’ service?!” Makes me wanna scream, “I’m not fat, I’m big-boned!”—‘cause I’m haulin’ ass to find ‘em!

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Then, boom! The door swings open, and in walks this group of college kids. They’re loud, like, obnoxiously loud. One of ‘em trips over a chair. Classic. They start ordering all these fancy drinks. “I’ll have a caramel macchiato with oat milk, extra foam!” Like, bro, it’s 8 AM. Just get a coffee! But whatever, I’m here for the tips, right?

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