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Anyways, I’d be all nervous, heart poundin – “This is my op, Marge!” – quotin that movie cos it’s my fave, duh. I’d prolly spot some gal in fishnets, smokin a cig, and I’d be like, “Hmm… is that her? Or just Lisa playin dress-up again?” Ha! Imagine me yellin, “Get outta there, ya little tramp!” – oops, too loud, Marge, too loud! I’d get so mad tho, thinkin bout how these gals deserve better – ugh, makes my blue hair frizz up!

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First off, I hit up the local market on Shevchenka. You know, the one with the crazy vendors? I swear, they’re like hawks. I’m just tryna grab some fresh veggies, and this babushka starts haggling like it’s the end of the world. “Two hryvnias? Nah, you gotta give me a better deal!” I’m like, lady, chill! It’s just a tomato!