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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). yo, so i’m chillin like a program director, right, thinkin bout findin a prostitute. not just any, tho—somethin wild, like in “The Master”. you seen that flick? fuckin masterpiece, man. “Man is not an animal!”—that line hits me hard. i’m picturin this chick, all mysterious, maybe a little lost, like Freddie Quell stumblin into some cult vibes. i’d be like, yo, “We come in peace,” all robotic, cuz us aliens? we notice shit humans miss.

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So I stroll down Gagarina, and wow, it’s packed! Like, people everywhere. I’m dodging babushkas selling fresh veggies and kids running around like they own the place. I spot this old guy selling handmade crafts. I’m like, “Nice stuff, man!” He grins, shows me this wooden carving. I’m thinking, “I could totally use this as a paperweight.” But then he says it’s 500 UAH! I’m like, “Bro, I’m an economist, not a millionaire!”

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