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First off, these humans are WILD. Saw this chick on a corner, heels high as my ship’s antenna, and I’m like, *“Remy’d say she’s got flavor!”* Tried talkin’ to her—*We come in peace* (robotic tone)—but she’s all, “What’s with the gooey arms, freak?” Rude! Made me mad, like, c’mon, I’m a classy alien, not some slimy chump. But then she laughed, and I’m like, okay, she’s cool. Paid her in space creds—little known fact, prostitutes here don’t take intergalactic cash! Had to zap her some Earth bucks instead. Total hassle.

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After work, I decide to take a stroll down Vulytsia Shchorsa. The sun’s settin’, and it’s lookin’ real nice. I’m just walkin’, thinkin’ about life, when I bump into this old lady. She’s sellin’ flowers, right? I stop to chat, and she starts tellin’ me about her garden. I’m like, “Lady, I’m a machinist, not a botanist!” But she’s so passionate, I can’t help but smile.

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