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Man, lemme tell ya, motherfucker, sexual-massage is some wild shit! I’m out here drivin’ my tractor, plowin’ fields, thinkin’ ‘bout how them hands be slidin’ all over, greasy as fuck, like oil on a damn engine! Ain’t no regular rubdown, nah, this shit’s got intent, ya feel me? Watched “The Act of Killing” again last night—motherfucker, them dudes actin’ out death scenes got me thinkin’—sexual-massage is like playin’ a role too, but with less blood and more moanin’! “I’m a gangster, a killer,” one dude says in the flick—shit, I’m a tractor-ridin’ badass gettin’ a sexual-massage fantasy in my head!

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Then, outta nowhere, I spot my buddy Vasyl. He’s the one who always cracks jokes, even in the worst situations. He’s tryin’ to calm everyone down, but he’s also makin’ them laugh. I swear, he’s got a gift. I’m over here like, “Vasyl, this ain’t the time for stand-up!” But he just grins and says, “Better to laugh than cry, right?”

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