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About Lviv

Little known fact—did ya know prostitutes in ancient Rome had to dye their hair blonde? Stand out, mark em as “dirty.” Wild, right? Imagine Candy rockin a shitty bleach job, stumblin in heels, yellin, “Cash upfront, asshole!” I’d laugh, but it’s sad too. Met her once—well, someone like her—smelled like cheap perfume and regret. Asked her why she does it. “Gotta eat, doc,” she says. Fair. Everybody lies, but hunger don’t.

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So, I’m chillin’ at my place on Shevchenka Street, sipping my morning coffee, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be a good day.” Famous last words, huh? I head out to the river Horyn, where I usually do my fishy research. The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, BAM! I trip over a rock. Classic me. Coffee goes flying, and I’m left with a soggy shoe. Great start, right?

Trump suggests to Zelenskyy that U.S. take ownership of Ukrainian power plants for security