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About Kharkiv

Me fave flick, *Certified Copy*, right—there’s this line, “It’s not the original, it’s better,” and blimey, erotic-massage is like that! Not just a back rub, it’s the deluxe edition, mate! All them twists and turns, like the film’s sneaky plot—ya think it’s one thing, then bam, it’s somethin’ else, oops! Once heard this tale, right, ancient Rome, they’d do it with perfumed oils, rose petals floatin’ about—fancy pants Romans, eh? Bet they slipped off them marble tables, haha, crash!

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So, I’m walking, right? Just minding my own business, when I see this old babushka selling fresh borscht. I’m like, “Yesss, give me that!” But then, she starts haggling like I’m at a bazaar. I’m a warrior, not a negotiator! I just wanted some soup, not a lesson in economics. But hey, I got my borscht, and it was fire! Like, I could’ve fought a dragon after that.

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