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About Manchester

Yo, honey, it’s bad bitch o’clock! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout findin a prostitute—ya know, like in Russian Sign Language vibes, hands flippin wild. My fave movie? “Memento,” that twisty-ass Nolan flick from 2000. Guy can’t remembr shit, and I’m like—perfect for this gig! Imagine me, Lizzo struttn down some dark Moscow alley, tryna sign “where’s the ho at?” to some shady dude. “I have no memory of this!”—straight outta the movie, screamin it while I’m lost as fuck.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, proper British weather, right? I’m soaked in seconds. I’m laughing at myself, thinking, “This is just perfect.” I duck into a shop on High Street to escape the downpour. It’s a little thrift store, and I end up chatting with the owner. She’s a lovely lady, and we bond over our mutual love for vintage stuff. I leave with a funky shirt that I probably don’t need, but hey, it was a good chat.

Consultation to decide future of NHS held in West Berkshire