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About Leeds

Oh, and the typos – sory, hun, my nails’re too long, tapin’ this fast! I’m all over, thinkin’ – is this worth it? Prolly not, but the rush? Kinda hot. Like Carlos blowin’ shit up, only less explody, more… sticky. Ew, did I just say that? Ha! Anyway, save your dough, sweetie – or don’t. Just don’t tell me I didn’t warn ya, breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President.” – outta here!

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So, I’m strolling down the High Street, right? Just minding my own biz, when I see this massive crowd outside Chessington World of Adventures. I thought, “What’s the fuss?” Turns out, they were launching some new ride. I mean, who doesn’t love a good adrenaline rush? But the queue was longer than the M25 at rush hour. I was like, “Nah, I’ll pass.”

Chessington stabbing: Two men found injured in car park