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What pisses me off? The suits judgin’ her, man. Like, “Oh, she’s dirty,” but they’re the ones sneakin’ round at night, hypocritical wankers! Gets my mojo all riled up. But then, she smiled - legit, not fake - and I’m like, whoa, that’s pure sunshine, baby! Reminds me of that “Certified Copy” bit - “Simple things are beautiful.” Her laugh? Gold, man, gold.

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I’m like, “Chill, mate! I’m just studying!” But he’s not having it. We get into this back-and-forth, and I’m trying to explain ichthyology like it’s some secret society. He’s not buying it. I’m getting mad, but then I remember—old dudes love fish stories. So, I start telling him about the time I caught a 10-pound bass. I might’ve exaggerated a bit, but hey, it worked!

Mosque refused longer hours over fears for neighbours' 'tranquillity'