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Where’s ya look? Dark corners, mate—alleys, dodgy pubs, online too, them apps! Me vet eyes, they spot things—prossies got this walk, yeh? Swayin’, hips talkin’, like cats huntin’ mice. Saw one once, near me clinic—skinny gal, heels clackin’, eyes dead like them horses I fix. Made me mad, precious! World’s rotten, chewin’ ‘em up—*Melancholia* vibes, “No more happy nights!” she’d say if she watched it.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, proper British weather. I’m soaked in seconds. I dash for cover under a tree, and guess what? I slip on the wet grass. I’m lying there, drenched, and I can’t help but laugh. “This is my life,” I think.

Man, 23, charged with murder after body found at Doncaster house