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About London

Lemme spill some tea—back in old Rome, whores had this trick, right? They’d dye their hair blonde with pigeon poop! Can ya believe that? Smelly, but it worked—made em stand out. I’d be all, “Hmm… that’s nasty!” But it’s kinda genius, ya know? Shows ya how far they’d go. Makes me happy seein that hustle, but angry too—why’d they hafta? Society’s a jerk sometimes.

Cumnock on a map

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While I’m there, I meet this old bloke named Jim. He’s got stories for days. He’s lived in Cumnock his whole life. He tells me about the old coal mines and how the town’s changed. I’m all ears, hanging on every word. It’s like a history lesson, but way more fun.

Cumnock and Doon Valley projects to receive major funding boost