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Me mate, last week, he goes lookin’, right? Thinks he’s slick, but nah—cops nabbed ‘im quick. Pissed me off, precious! “You’re not a kid anymore,” I signs at ‘im, like from *Boyhood*. Grow up, ya twat! But then, this prossie I met once—swear she glowed, like hope in the filth. Made me happy, yeh, her laugh cut through the stink. “Life doesn’t give ya bumpers,” she says—movie line, bam, stuck in me skull.

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After that chaos, I decide to hit up the park. Eltham Park, to be exact. It’s got this lovely lake, and I’m thinking, “This is it. This is my zen moment.” But no! There’s a bunch of kids screaming and running around. I’m like, “Can’t a person catch a break?” I sit on a bench, trying to meditate or whatever, but all I can hear is “MUM! LOOK AT ME!”

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