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About Newcastle

So I hit the streets, right? Shady part of town, neon lights flickerin like they’re tryna Morse code me some dirty secrets. I’m thinkin, “The cipher’s in the streets, man!”—straight outta *Zodiac*. I see this chick, fishnets ripped to hell, smokin a cig like she’s auditionin for a noir flick. I’m like, “Hey, you workin?” She squints at me, all sassy, “What’s it to ya, grandma?” Grandma?! Bitch, I’m Tina fuckin Fey, I’ll roast you from here to Siberia! Got me heated, but I laughed—props for guts, ya know?

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So, we’re in this meeting, right? And my colleague, Sarah, spills coffee all over the prototype. I mean, c’mon! It’s like a scene from a bad sitcom. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “This is a disaster!”

Grass fire at Enfield Lock tackled by firefighters