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So, picture this—I’m walkin’ down some sketchy street, lookin’ for a hooker, right? Not me personally, I’m too paranoid—germs, awkward convos, oh god no! But say I was—neon lights flicker, I’m sweatin’, thinkin’, “What if she’s a cop?” Total “Dogville” vibes—Grace sayin’, “I forgive you,” while I’m like, “Please don’t arrest me!” I’d be terrible at this—stammerin’, “Uh, how much? Wait, no, never mind!” It’s like a bad sitcom, me hagglin’ over somethin’ I don’t even want.

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First off, I’m on my way to the job on High Street, right? And I’m cruisin’ along, mindin’ my own biz, when I see this old lady, bless her heart, tryin’ to cross the road. She’s like a tortoise on a mission, slow and steady. I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, love, you can do it!” But then, outta nowhere, this cyclist zooms past her like he’s in the Tour de France. I swear, I nearly lost it! I mean, what’s the rush, mate? It’s not like the finish line is at the other side of the street!

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