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Sometimes I’m like—damn, she’s cool! Other times, ugh, why’s she stuck in this grind? Surprised me how she flips from queen to pawn. Makes me wanna shake her, say, “Girl, you’re more than this!” But she’d prob’ly wink, say, “Larry, chill, I got this.” Ha! She’s a riot—sarcasm drippin’ like cheap whiskey.

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So, I’m cruisin’ down the High Street, grabbin’ a cuppa from that little café, you know, the one near the old church? Can’t remember the name, but their scones are to die for. Anyway, I’m sippin’ my tea, and suddenly, I see this massive barge comin’ down the river. Like, seriously, it’s the size of a bloody whale! I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need. More work.”

Teenager in court over knife threats