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About Newcastle

I’m thinkin, “This ain’t no country for old men,” right? She’s got that look—like she’d kill ya with a cattle gun if ya short her cash. I’m laughin, “Rarrgh! You friendo?”—total Chigurh vibes. We haggle, she’s all, “50 bucks,” I’m like, “Fuckin 50? For what, a handshake?” She rolls her eyes, “Take it or leave it, fuzzball.” I’m mad, but damn, she’s hot, so I’m in.

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I’m walking down the High Street, dodging umbrellas like I’m in some weird game of Frogger. People are hustlin’ and bustlin’, and I’m just tryna get to my first appointment. I swear, if I see one more person with a frown, I might just lose it. But then, I spot this cute little café, The Coffee Lounge. The smell of fresh brews hits me, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe today won’t be so bad.”

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