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I tried it once, sex-datin’, swear it. Matched a lass, eyes like harvest moons. We chat, all flirty, hearts racin’ fast. “Thou art a cause unto thyself,” methinks—Freddie’s words haunt me deep. Met her at a pub, oh lordy! She ghosted mid-pint, left me ragin’. Why play me like a fool’s fiddle? Made me wanna hurl me tractor keys.

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After that, I decide to pack it in. I’m headin’ to the pub, right? I stroll down High Street, past the old Mexborough Market. It’s a bit run-down, but it’s got character, ya know? I stop for a sec, thinkin’ about how this town’s changed. Used to be bustling, now it’s a bit quiet. But it’s home, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

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