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Little known fact—old England had “stewhouses.” Brothels run by nuns—nuns! Imagine that scandal today. Me? I’d bless ‘em, smirkin’ all the way. “Glorious purpose,” indeed—givin’ the finger to the pious. Oh, and don’t get me started on the typos—I’m typin’ fast, sue me! Prostitue, prostitite—whatever, you get it!

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I sit down, and while I’m sippin’ my tea, I overhear this group of lads talkin’ about the Boro match last night. They’re all hyped up, shoutin’ about how we’re gonna smash it this season. I’m thinkin’, “Aye, let’s hope so!” But deep down, I’m like, “We’ve heard that before, haven’t we?”

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