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I spot her – red heels. Skirt so short – WHOA! She’s leanin’ on a lamppost. Smokin’. I’m like – jackpot! But then – this drunk sailor stumbles up. Starts yellin’. “I SAW HER FIRST!” And I’m pissed! Blood boilin’! I’m thinkin’ – “This is MY story!” Like – who’s this clown? Ruinin’ my night! I almost deck him. But – nah. Too much effort.

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But no time for snacks! I get a call from Mrs. Thompson on Church Street. She’s freakin’ out about some rats in her garden. I rush over, dodgin’ kids on bikes and old folks walkin’ their poodles. When I get there, she’s standin’ on her porch, lookin’ like she’s seen a ghost. “They’re in my flower beds!” she yells.

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