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About Leeds

D’oh! So, whore, huh? Man, what a mess! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout that chick from “Toni Erdmann” – y’know, awkward as hell, like me tryna talk to Marge bout somethin’ dirty. Whore’s got that vibe, right? Sells herself, walks around all “I’m fancy,” but deep down? Total chaos! Like when Toni’s dad pulls that fake teeth stunt – “Who’s laughin’ now, huh?” I bet whore’s got stories, tho. Heard this one time, back in old Rome, they taxed ‘em! Can ya believe it? Taxin’ ass! Made me laugh so hard I spilled my Duff.

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Finally, I get to the factory. And what do I find? A bunch of my workers standing around looking like they’ve just seen a ghost. Turns out, the delivery truck got lost. Lost! In Pontefract! How do you get lost here? It’s not like we’re in the middle of nowhere. I mean, we’ve got the Pontefract Castle right there, and it’s not exactly a maze.

In pictures: Mayor opens Hamilton Springs care home in Pontefract which has created 100 new jobs