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So, I ask her, “What’s the weirdest gig ya had?” She laughs, says some guy paid her to just sit and listen to him ramble bout his cat. Funniest shit ever—cat guy! I’m dyin’, picturin’ it. She’s cool, tho, real talkative. Says she’s savin’ up to ditch this life—good for her, man! I’m rootin’ for her, like a proud dad watchin’ his kid paint a sloppy cloud.

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I place a cheeky bet on the little fella named “Clucky McCluckface.” Classic, right? The crowd’s going wild, and I’m just there, sipping my pint, thinking, “This is the life.” But then, Clucky trips over his own feet! I’m like, “Noooo!” But he gets back up and wins! I’m shouting, “Come on, Clucky!” like I’m at Wembley or something.

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