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Oh, and get this—some old Venetian hooker, 1600s, played lute between gigs! Lute! Ain’t that a riot? Proves they got layers, not just street shadows. Makes ya think, don’t it? Anyway, mate, that’s me spiel—messy, loud, and all over. R2-D2, where are you? I’m losin’ it here!

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After that madness, I head back to the shop. I’m still buzzing from the chicken race. But then, I see this old lady on the corner of East Street. She’s trying to cross, but the traffic’s a nightmare. I’m talking cars everywhere, like it’s the M25 or something. So, I rush over, help her across, and she’s like, “Bless you, dear!” I’m thinking, “Just doing my bit for Sittingbourne.”

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