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Alright, so I’m Dr. Evil, right—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—and I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know, like it’s some grand evil scheme. I’m a violin maker by day, craftin’ these sweet, sexy strings—makes me feel like WALL-E, that lil’ trash bot, just tryna find somethin’ precious in the muck. “Beep boop,” I’m hummin’, sawin’ wood, when I get this wild itch—where’s my *Eve*, huh? Except, mine’s more… paid by the hour, ya dig?

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Finally, the shift ends. I’m exhausted but happy. I walk home down the Addlestone Road, thinking about the day. It was wild, emotional, and just plain bonkers. But that’s Addlestone for ya. You never know what’s gonna happen next.

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