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But here’s the kicker—I’m fascinated, okay? Not doin’ it, just the logistics! How do they even advertise? Craigslist is dead, so what—X posts? “DM for a good time”? I’d be scrollin’, yellin’, “This is insane!” Surprised me how sneaky they get—codes, emojis, the works. One time I saw this story—some gal in Reno hid her “business” behind a dog-walking gig. Dogs! Genius, right? Made me happy for like two seconds—then I’m back to ragin’. Why can’t I think of scams that smart?

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, come on! I just wanted five minutes of peace! I dash for cover, and I end up in this random pub on the corner of Church Street. It’s cozy, and the smell of chips hits me like a wave. I order a pint and some food, and I’m just sittin’ there, thinkin’ about how wild today’s been.

Alloa goalkeeper awarded Player of the Year by club directors