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Once, I heard this story—some chick in Vegas got paid in casino chips! True story, swear on my Duff! She’s all, “Cash me out, baby!”—hilarious, right? I’m laughin’, but then—D’oh!—I’m sad again, ‘cause it’s messy, ya know? These gals got lives, and here I am, a doofus, oglin’ ‘em. “Blessed are the forgetful,” I mutter, wishin’ I could zap this night outta my skull like Joel and Clem. Maybe I’ll stick to donuts—safer, cheaper, and Marge won’t kill me! D’oh!

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I woke up in Blyth, right? The sun was barely up, and I was already late for my meeting at the Blyth Workspace on Quay Street. Typical me. I rushed outta my flat on Crofton Road, barely remembering to grab my laptop. I mean, who needs breakfast when you’ve got deadlines, am I right?

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