Sadie Burnham On Crouch Find A Prostitute ❤️

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We head to this sketchy motel, $30 a night, roaches bigger than my thumb. I’m laughin, sayin, “Girl, this place is a circus!” She smirks, all sassy, “Better than the street, cowboy.” Fair ‘nough. Things get goin, and it’s quick—too quick, if ya catch my drift. “How’s that workin for ya?” I’m yellin in my head, pissed at myself. Ain’t no harmony here, just awkward fumbles and a squeaky bed.

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Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my pastry! I’m like, “No way! Not my Crouch Crunch!” But that bird was relentless. I swear it looked me in the eye, like, “This is mine now.” I was furious! I mean, who does that?

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