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Real talk—findin’ a pro ain’t cheap. You’re dodgin’ cops, weirdos, and—get this—some cities got “prostitution stings” that’ll catch ya mid-haggle! Happened to a guy I knew—busted, humiliated, and guess who had to hear it? Me! I’m like, “Pretty, pretty bad decision, buddy!” Couldn’t stop laughin’, though—sick sense of humor, I guess. And don’t get me started on the health risks—STD roulette! I’d overthink it, “Is this covered? Is THAT covered?!” Probly why I stick to movies, not “street research.”

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First off, I’m walkin’ past the old chapel—fancy that, huh?—and I see this dog. A big ol’ mutt, just sittin’ there, lookin’ at me like I owe him money. I’m like, “Mate, I don’t even have a biscuit for ya!” But then, outta nowhere, this wee kid runs up and starts petting the dog. I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I’m jealous of a dog.”

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